Incarnating Lawful Love among Enemies

A Personal Note: every person has suffered from conflict in his/her life. No one of us is exempted, although some have certainly experienced more destructive conflict than others. Extreme alienation is produced by relentless, destructive and violent enmity. Recovering from a toxic environment which breeds enmity and murderous stress takes a while, and without God’s love, presence and strong support from wise companions, complete healing is unreachable. Whether we’re cognizant of the reality or not, most of us have seen Jesus’ warning in Matt. 12:43-45 manifested in people we have known. Many, if not all, of us have experienced the stress of people who seek to harm us, personally or professionally, and who try to fracture the peace and harmony we have within our families and relationships. These people imagine personal gain to be in others' destruction. Two of my closest genetic relatives have attempted to destroy my marriage, undermine my family, relationships and career for many years & decades. My background is highly academic, and so I’ve wrestled to understand their actions and enmity from the perspective of my faith journey with Jesus Christ, and as a thorough-going intellectual with degrees in politics, economics and theology, with training and work in biblical conflict resolution. (Though I try to write simply, in other words, I frequently fail! This is a looong post. (o: ) As a Christ-follower, Jesus called me to love God, neighbors and enemies in my thoughts, prayers, words and actions. Jesus’ call kills me. Simply put, I don’t want to love these people who actively seek the destruction of my life and family relationships. But, to follow Jesus, my natural self and its demands must die. Sometimes, that death has felt like hell. Forgiving is the biblical process of letting go of our natural self’s demands, and allowing God to judge others in God’s time. Enemies, by definition, continuously trespass healthy boundaries. (Let Christ-followers remind ourselves, again, all of us have trespassed against others!) In Christ, by the power of the Holy Spirit, I have chosen love, not enmity. What I reflect about my journey, below, is meant to encourage others. Perhaps, the patterns observed in those who love and those who hate might resonate with others’ observations, too. May this encourage those who love God to keep following Jesus.  To those who don’t know him, Jesus lives. He is God’s lawful love incarnate – steadfast, faithful, trustworthy, grace-filled and true. God is good. Jesus said,

⁴³“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ ⁴⁴But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, ⁴⁵so that you may be children of your Father in heaven; for he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteous and on the unrighteous. ⁴⁶For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? ⁴⁷And if you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? ⁴⁸Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5)

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When most of us think about laws, we think about a list of rules external to us, actions we should or should not take based on criteria about which most of us had no influence. The prophets, Jesus, and his apostles, however, clearly indicate that humans already embody laws in our bodies – thoughts, words, tastes, preferences, actions, experiences, reactions and interactions. By our words, actions, and choices we are constantly revealing whom or what we worship. In our bodies, we are constantly judging and assessing whether others measure up to our norms of what is “good”, right, fair, just, moral, appropriate or “tasteful” to do. However, as do speed limits, traffic regulations, societal expectations and criminal laws, human norms are constantly fluctuating, formed, hardened and softened through good and bad experiences, affected by good, bad, persuasive, manipulative &/or powerful people, across cultures, within the course of time. This simplistic (& reductionist) 3-dimensional grid gives an idea of how we naturally embody “laws”. Imagine the diamonds on the grid representing one person measured according to a set of standards, at a certain point in time…

 The horizontal plane gives the subjective measure of how little/much a person has and accumulates, and the vertical ordering gives the ranking a person enacts at any given day or period in life, by priorities of time, energy and resources. If we add the 3^rd dimension of the depth of time, the fluidity and inter-relationships of the points becomes more obvious, and we begin to perceive that our life has markers at certain moments (the diamonds), but also assumes a shape and direction over time. Imagine this dynamic continually being enacted in our body and choices, and the dimensions take shape in the person we see in the mirror. The person I am lives within a far more complex developing constellation of people, culture, race, ethnicity and history.

As we naturally interact according to our own & others’ relative positions on the grid of our bodies & human positions, we will fail to meet people on the holy ground of God’s saving grace, mercy and welcome in Christ. We cannot see ourselves, or know what God knows of us. We cannot fully see who others are in God’s sight, where they need God, where they struggle, now, and how they long for healing and wholeness. We’re stuck assessing them and ourselves according to human measurements from our relative scale which is subject to time and our bodies. (Rom. 8:5-7) Just as one person has one view from the floor of a canyon, so another person has a different view when stuck on a cliff, even if both views are reflected “truly” at that moment & immediate context. Every aspect of and each behavioral choice we’ve made in our whole life affects the angles from which we justify, measure and/or condemn ourselves and others. Metaphorically, as soon as we freeze time’s passage to measure and judge ourselves or others, we’ve measured inaccurately and untruthfully.  The Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle provides a physical metaphor for this spiritual truth: the more accurately a scientist calculates the position of a particle in physics, the less accurately the particle’s speed can be measured, and vice versa.

We cannot see the activity of God in our assessments of our own or others’ positions on the grid. We can only perceive the Holy Spirit’s continuing breath & life by maintaining our connection to Godself, and inasmuch as possible from our side, with one another.  We cannot know others’ hearts, yet we should discern developing fruit (or lack) and our own or others’ motion toward light or darkness, toward confessing or hiding of sins, toward growing peace and unity or harboring alienation. 

Maintaining enmity absolutely depends upon the stoppage of time at particular points, so that our human grid positions freeze in our subjective position of judgment/approval, condemnation/release, divorce/affinity, murder, alienation, gossip, slander and perceptions of morality/ immorality. Of course, the judging one claims the “higher” law or principle by which he/she condemns others, permanently. That law/principle, however externally supported (even with scriptural principles), becomes the unrighteous, hammering gavel by which people demand satisfaction, condemn or approve of one another. (Rom. 7:5) The ongoing suffering of people in the land of Palestine/Israel is one manifestation of an ancient “good” promise held sacrosanct to harm others, today.  That shard of time can become a prism of refracted light, or an icicle to stab someone with.

One peculiar manifestation of persons frozen in enmity is an irrational inability to perceive anyone and even time itself from outside of her/his singular viewpoint from a particular past grid position & perspective. S/he continues bringing the past into the present, with human words puffing breath vainly into the past’s rotting glory or shame. All the referents are from within her/his body’s grid, then, and even verifiable, subsequent and superseding facts are ignored, warped, omitted and denied so s/he can maintain that position of self-justified condemnation and enmity. “Evidence” is fabricated out of nothing. Real and imagined “facts”, deliberately isolated from time & others’ perspectives, and deliberately positioned as the scope through which all else is viewed, become the warped weapons by which s/he fight people. S/he will not be reconciled to God, self or others. She or he holds that position in their grid as if life itself depended on it. However, Life is truly lived elsewhere. Sadly, the grid’s triumph, his/her fixed position, and the enmity produced manifests death, not life. The breath humans puff at the past and death is lifeless and without power to create new life. 

Another peculiar manifestation of sworn enemies is that they demand the ultimate word. S/he cannot “lose”; every encounter is win/lose. The only resolution for them is in a declaration of their right-ness, not reconciliation on any other ground but that of the false god of their “principle” within their singular view and story of some “reality”. Her/his view becomes the meta-narrative by which others should live and view all of life. (For philosopher friends, the breakdown of post-modernism is that its denial of over-arching meta-narratives requires the replacement of a common meta-narrative with an individualistic one. “What’s ethical to you is your ‘good’ choice, and what’s good for me is fine, too.”) Such a resolution violates any reconciliation possible in Christ, which is founded on the rock of God’s steadfast love, grace, truth, mercy, justice and redemption. Neither truth nor reality itself has any effect on his/her demand for the offender to return to the ground of his/her enmity, unforgiven. There, on that ground, the offender must bow down to the enemy’s principle, story, demand, and sacrifice their own. That demand is the very crux of idolatry and false worship. Followers of Christ know the forgiveness of God that permeates all of life, present, past and future, in all of its health and brokenness, and they rejoice that the power of God’s love surely triumphed over death in Jesus Christ. Even the Hebrew psalmists knew that our forgiveness is grounded on God’s love:

⁶ Be mindful of your mercy, O LORD, and of your steadfast love,

for they have been from of old.

⁷ Do not remember the sins of my youth or my transgressions;

according to your steadfast love remember me,

for your goodness’ sake, O LORD!

⁸ Good and upright is the LORD;

therefore he instructs sinners in the way. (Psalm 25)

There is no humanly accessible life, truth, grace, love, justice and mercy outside of time, because we ourselves live subject to time. Mercy requires ongoing love; we needed the self-emptying incarnation to see the living God-beyond-time, truly, here, now, in future hope, and then. We worship the LORD God, “I AM, I WAS, and I WILL BE”; we serve the Alpha and Omega, the first and the last Word full of grace and truth. This helps explain why reconciliation is improbable with certain people. The true law of love which reflects the living, changing and moving reality is subjected to and falsified by his/her demands that everyone see through his/her scope of a frozen interpretative grid. As Proverb 29:9 clarifies,

If the wise go to law with fools,

There is ranting and ridicule without relief.

Paul didn’t allow his weaknesses (1 Cor. 15:8-9) or his strengths (Phil. 3:4-6) to determine how he understood himself or others; rather, all believers are “crucified with Christ”. Paul refused to judge himself or relate to believers according to his legalistic flesh.

Yet whatever gains I had, these I have come to regard as loss because of Christ. More than that, I regard everything as loss because of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things, and I regard them as crap*, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law [my position on any human grid], but one that comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God based on faith. (Phil. 3:7-9)  [ *lit. Greek, BDAG]

Paul clearly interpreted life, reality, other people and himself from the foundation of and through God’s grace revealed sufficient in the cross and resurrection of Jesus Christ. He focused on the continuing work of God in Christ for them and called them to live by the power of the Holy Spirit being revealed in them. “And this [batch of sinners] is what some of you used to be. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.” (1 Cor. 6: 11)

The lens through which faithful Christians read life, people and scripture is God’s love incarnate in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus. We who follow him have chosen, by grace in the Holy Spirit, to receive the death which our sins have wrought, and now rejoice in our deliverance through death into new life. As we are being conformed to God’s law of love, we bear Christ and one another, we continue to be set free from our own and their human legalistic grid – free to see others with God’s loving eyes as the Holy Spirit enables us, apart from our sins and their sins, and free to call them to the freedom and life we celebrate “in Christ”. We seek to be conformed to him by the power of the Holy Spirit, so our embodied law evidences God’s steadfast love, eternal life and super-abundant grace. (Rom. 5:15-21)

When we freeze our viewpoints and our human actions of justification or judgment outside of time’s and others’ reach, we have elevated ourselves to an unmerciful, unforgiving, condemning, self-justifying false and frozen idol.

¹ Not to us, O LORD, not to us, but to your name give glory, for the sake of your steadfast love and your faithfulness.
² Why should the nations say, “Where is their God?”
³ Our God is in the heavens; he does whatever he pleases.
⁴ Their idols are silver and gold, the work of human hands.
⁵ They have mouths, but do not speak; eyes, but do not see.
⁶ They have ears, but do not hear; noses, but do not smell.
⁷ They have hands, but do not feel; feet, but do not walk; they make no sound in their throats.
⁸ Those who make them are like them; so are all who trust in them. (Psalm 115)

As Christians, we call on one another to worship, love and honor the one and only living God whose very redemptive love is grace-filled incarnate Word. God lives! Jesus lives! This God continues to sanctify, to speak, to guide, to wash, to conform us to Christ, by the power of the indwelling Holy Spirit and to make us holy in the course of life, in this time. We await this God’s advent, we seek his kingdom come, now. May the church be the Body of Christ, building up and encouraging one another to persevere in picking up our crosses and following Jesus. Even so, come, Lord Jesus!

Malfunctions of the Christian Faith

Miroslav Volf speaking on A Public Faith in this YouTube video gives a wonderful distinction between a coercive faith and an idle faith. His words reminded me strongly of Paul's words to the Corinthians recorded in 1 Corinthians 15. Paul gave a smidgeon of his own coercive religious history from which he was redeemed in v. 9, but plainly questioned whether the Corinthians behavior revealed their own faith to have been "in vain".  (Cf. the first 14 chapters for that behavior!)

Volf's new book, A Public Faith, is reviewed here, and I appreciate that the reviewer picked up on some the ramifications also addressed, below.

Volf's thoughts in the video inspired my own tangents. (I'm looking forward to reading the book, in its entirety!) Whether humans want to identify themselves as religious, irreligious or atheist really isn't central to the question of "faith" or "trust" which is manifested by how one lives life. If I should believe that my way of living is superior to any other, then I should choose whether to commend it to others or not. If yes, I might then employ all sorts of subjective variables to govern when/ where/ with whom/ if/ how I commend my way. To use coercion or not is one such variable. If coercion is a possibility, what type of coercion is permissible - verbal, intellectual, legal, financial, persuasion of rank or status, psychological, physical - then, which methods with whom?

You may be able to see that the variables are as infinite as the people and circumstances in which they find themselves.

If I choose not to commend my way to others, then I would have one form of idle faith. I trust in no one, except in my self, the singular, limited view from within that self, and the limited experiences of one person. My way works for me, alone, and for no other. Perhaps I simply would have no aspirations to understand why one would live my way or choose their own way. That might sound appealing to many folk, today, because choosing a particular way is perceived to be offensive to all who might choose otherwise, according to their own variables. However, sooner or later, my way will come face to face with other people, and then my idle faith will be challenged by their way of their own version of idle faith or coercive faith or other choices of what/who to trust... Then, what happens?

Religion forms as a concert of people believe that these ways promote life, peace and harmony in community. Explained so, it should be obvious why laws and religious beliefs conjoin so readily in public life. There are as many religious beliefs as there are self-affirming groups. Many definitions of "religion" incorporate the supernatural. Historically, the supernatural has been perceived to be the commendation and the imprimatur of god(s) upon these ways. If God (or gods) exist then these ways are more than the sum of humanity's thoughts. Anthropomorphic gods are those whose ways are obviously as flawed as humans are flawed, devious, unethical, greedy, ambitious, lustful, self-serving, demanding of obsequious approval, unquestioning obedience, & rejection of all other ways, and prone to rage when not satisfied, etc. There are also religions whose god(s) follow ways other than human ways.

When asked why he believed the Biblical message of God-in-Christ, Eugene Peterson's response was simple and forthright; as I recall, he said, essentially, "because I can live what I believe." If a religion's God is other than merely human, the ways commended need to be fulfillable internally and externally, as it were. Christian belief is that by God's grace, when we face the truth, acknowledge our weaknesses, and confess our wrongs and broken ways, we welcome God to transform our lives from the heart outward, so that we may obey God. The God who embodied Love-with-us, who comes in grace and truth to both friends and enemies, is beyond merely human, as we confess we are.

There are also people who commend and try to coerce others toward certain ways which they themselves have not lived. Current news reports recount heightened public anger against politicians, religious figures, attorneys, and others entrusted with authority who have privately failed to honor whatever patriotic, God-honoring or people-honoring "higher" principles they've publicly professed. We viscerally recognize that such people's commendations are inevitably hypocritical, and if we have sufficient courage and self-awareness, we acknowledge that human lack of moral character clouds discernment, because whatever actions we excuse in ourselves skews our perceptions. Sound judgment proceeds from a life embodying wisdom and knowledge.

For Christians, perceiving that Jesus' anger was directed against such hypocrisy and legalistic obfuscation informs our understanding of Jesus' harsh words recorded in Matthew 23. Matthew described an escalating succession of attempts to entrap Jesus beginning at 21:23, and ending with the lawyer's questioning him in 22:34-36. Entrapment, by definition, only serves the ambitions and interests of the trapper. When the selfish goals of the hunters are exposed in the light, as Jesus exposed the Sadducees, Pharisees, lawyers and scribes, the hunters seek to hide from the truth and destroy the messenger(s), rather than face public ridicule and themselves. Hypocrisy - literally, judging others to standards while living below standards oneself - is the most dangerous form of idle faith. Hypocrites seek to destroy those who can see through their smoke and try to dissipate it.

Hypocrites lack, or merely pretend to have, an essential attribute of integrity: humility. We, humans are more persuaded by people of integrity who serve others than by any disembodied information. There are hypocrites who attain great wealth and/or power in this world, people whose arrogance and narcissism preclude ever admitting errors, flaws or wrongdoing, even - or, especially - in the face of truth. However, we can be thankful that there are also humble people who have become great, freely admitting that we all need one another, that no human can know all truth, that no single person can be an expert at all things, that we accept correction and responsibility for our errors - deliberate and unknowing. The humble wield what power they have in service of others. Humility is the antithesis of human presumption to "know" better than others; the humble listen, serve and love, even though they honor virtues which counter others' ways. The ways (i.e., faith) of the humble will withstand the assault of arrogant self-interest. Coercive faith, of any stripe, is inherently presumptuous. Embodied humility cannot be coercive because humble people serve and consider others' best interests. John Dickson's book, Humilitas, was inspired by his participation in an academic project of Macquarie University in Australia which explored the historical origins of the virtue of humility. In ancient Greece and Rome, humility was scorned and derided as servitude, perceived only as appropriate for lower classes toward superiors, while pride (arrogance) was celebrated as a virtue among men. However, once there was humility incarnate, the willing sacrificing of an innocent and holy person for the guilty, who then rose from death - "and was declared to be Son of God with power according to the spirit of holiness by resurrection of the dead, Jesus Christ our Lord" (Romans 1:4), followers were inspired, humility was transformed, serving others redeemed, true power was revealed, and humanity could see by the love of God incarnated that love of neighbors was united with love of God.

The Simple, the Foolish and the Wicked

Reading scripture & praying have long formed the center of my daily spiritual discipline. Psalms and Proverbs form “corner pillars” for me, and I’ve read parts of these books almost daily for decades. Psalms are the liturgical songs & prayers of the Old Testament, and Proverbs is one book of Biblical “wisdom” literature. The psalmists taught me how to pray honestly – worshiping God alone, while facing the reality, head-on, of who I am and in what circumstances I find myself. The psalmists appeal to God to reveal his justice in the world, and to guide us in his ways. Proverbs have the purpose of raising up “wise” children to become wise men and women. The “wise” in Scripture are not those who are well-educated, well-traveled, able to reason or argue facilely, well-read, privileged, rich, or well-placed. As a matter of fact, those characteristics are more often markers associated with the unwise, the foolish and the wicked! Rather, as biblically-defined, “wise” people are those who follow God’s paths, commandments and ways in the world, act with truth and integrity, exhibit righteousness in the marketplaces and practice relational righteousness and compassion (toward the weak, the poor, the powerless, the widow, the orphan, the alien).

Years of prayerful, regular reading in Psalms and Proverbs have attuned me to patterns that occur in the overall content and flow in each book. The late Dr. Gerald Wilson, with whom I studied Psalms at Fuller Theological Seminary, specialized in “the shape of the Psalter”, and his teaching helped clarify themes in the Psalms and, indirectly, in Proverbs. Perhaps I could have reached my understandings earlier had I spent more time in rabbinic literature and OT commentaries. :-)  Nevertheless, it became clear that both books help the people of God to be shaped by God in order to embody wisdom, godly life and worship. In the early chapters in Proverbs, both parents (cooperating with God and his “master worker”, the feminine-voiced Wisdom) commend, admonish and describe the godly ways to raise children, the need for wise instruction and just discipline of children & youth, the avoidance of sinful companions, sexual immorality, drunkenness, and foolish behavior. A child is born “simple” and will act foolishly, at times. Without godly correction and discipline, our simpleness and foolishness will allow the influence of the wicked to increase over us. Wickedness is the end of those who repeatedly refuse to consider the outcome of their own foolish ways, and who ignore and deny what others’ actions and words reveal about their hearts. As the paths of the wicked & the wise interweave throughout the book of Proverbs, the wicked who won’t acknowledge either their own sin or others' godliness. The wicked seek to deceive others, cover up their own actions, and misuse their humanity and positions to harm others.  When acting unwisely and unlovingly in concert with those like them, the "fools" escalate to become “the wicked” who actively seek to lead others down their paths. In the "name of" a self-justifying end, pleasure, wealth, lust, or a misleading "good", the wicked draw in the simple and the fools.

One chapter that describes “the wisdom of the world” as foolishness in God’s sight is Proverbs 26. In the New Testament, Paul clearly drew on his knowledge of Psalms and Proverbs in his writing. For example, 1 Cor. 1:10-2:16 sets God’s wisdom and the worldly wisdom as antithetical and antipathetic to one another. The latter is evidenced by divisiveness & lording it over others, and the former by unifying love, justice and service of God and neighbor, in Christ.

Here are the first 8 verses of Proverbs 26, as an example of the distinction between the wise and the foolish:

Proverbs 26
¹ Like snow in summer or rain in harvest, so honor is not fitting for a fool.
² Like a sparrow in its flitting, like a swallow in its flying, an undeserved curse goes nowhere.
³ A whip for the horse, a bridle for the donkey, and a rod for the back of fools.
⁴ Do not answer fools according to their folly, or you will be a fool yourself.
⁵ Answer fools according to their folly, or they will be wise in their own eyes.
⁶ It is like cutting off one’s foot and drinking down violence, to send a message by a fool.
⁷ The legs of a disabled person hang limp; so does a proverb in the mouth of a fool.
⁸ It is like binding a stone in a sling to give honor to a fool.

 

There’s a Hebrew poetic device in the antithetical parallel in verses 4-5. On the one hand, v. 4 advises that to answer a fool according to their folly makes us a fool, too. However, in the very next verse, we’re advised to answer a fool according to their folly, so they won’t be wise in their own eyes. If we didn’t understand the context of Proverbs, we could throw up our hands in exasperation here, when using our own natural understanding and education-based reading. However, when one understands how folly should be responded to according to Proverbs, this changes the whole picture.

People of high educational achievement, according to the current academy, will inevitably misinterpret scripture at some/many/all points, if that education and credentialing is not founded upon godly wisdom. Our teachers, professors & colleagues teach us that rhetorical argument and logical presentations are keys to academic success & “victory”. Every academic degree or professional credential is celebrated as certifying this person as more qualified to lead, or teach, or advise than another “lesser” degreed or credentialed person. This is a hierarchically-based and often a crony-supporting system, although people of integrity are found within poor systems.

Wisdom, as described in OT and NT, counters that worldly victory and names it insufficient, at best, and false, at worst. 

If an immoral, dishonest, unethical, bullying, manipulative or domineering person proclaims his/her superiority over another (according to academic, credentialed, economic/financial, class, gendered, ethnic, or racial standards, etc.) in order to dictate another's behavior, Proverbs and the canon of Scripture name him/her as fools according to their unrighteous, unloving and unwise actions. Prov. 26:1 and 26:8 state clearly that honor is not fitting to a fool, and is, in fact, harmful; yet worldly businesses, society, media, organizations and the academy honor & acclaim fools all the time! In Scripture, fools are identified as fools by their choices and behavior, irrespective of their academic or economic prowess, position, status or credentials. 

Paul made this exact same point to the Corinthians. The key verses following his forthright, sarcastic description of the way the Corinthians were behaving (1 Cor. 4:6-13) are 4:17-21. Paul sent Timothy to Corinth to remind them of his “ways in Christ Jesus”, and not of Paul’s “plausible words of wisdom” (2:4-5). He told the Corinthians that he wasn’t interested in “the talk of these arrogant people”, at all, but in their power (what their deeds and actions reveal). (4:19) “For the kingdom of God depends not on talk but on power.” (4:20) The power of God is found in the cross of Christ, which is foolishness and a stumbling block to those who don’t seek God’s life and love in their hearts, in service of God & neighbor, to the spiritual transformation of their lives.

The fools as described in Proverbs, though, have not quite attained to full-blown wickedness. To return to that poetic antithetic parallel in vv. 4-5, what might the writer mean by stating we shouldn’t answer a fool according to his folly in the v. 4? Given the story of wisdom and foolishness in Scripture, it would seem that Paul gave the best response. We don’t answer fools by trying to reason them out of their positions. We don’t try to gain victory over them using the same worldly methods of rhetoric, education, position, human power, manipulation, deception, argumentation, etc. Although education, information and knowledge are useful to a servant who uses them in service of God and neighbors, in themselves, they cannot transform a fool. At times, we may not answer at all, in love and care for them. Proverbs 14:3 claims, “The talk of fools is a rod for their backs, but the lips of the wise preserve them.” As Paul asked in 1 Corinthians 4:21, “What would you prefer? Am I to come to you with a stick, or with love in a spirit of gentleness?” In other words, “will you Corinthians continue to be fools needing correction, or will you turn toward the demonstrated wisdom and power of God in Jesus Christ, and him crucified?” 

Yet, v. 5 indicates that fools might become aware of their foolishness and turned toward wisdom, somehow. But, how? We find out by looking at the context of that verse in the chapter, and the context of folly, fools and foolish behavior in Proverbs, overall. As harsh as it seems to our contemporary “sensibilities”, verse 3 commends physical discipline to drive out folly. The Proverbial “rod of discipline” used wisely must not be “a rod of anger”, or a rod that sows injustice (Prov. 22:8). It isn’t a rod of vengeance, or of oppression (Isa. 9:4), or an assertion of human power over another. It isn’t the rod of master over slave, superior over inferior, abuser over victims. The rod of loving discipline is used to alter the paths of the youthful and immature fools, to bring them back to wiser ways, choices and behaviors.  Consider the context of the rod in a psalm which is beloved by many to whom I’ve ministered – whether current or former church members – Psalm 23. “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff – they comfort me.” (23:4) We can and should cherish the awareness that the chastising of the Lord is for our good (Heb. 12:5-13), to give us appropriate laws which are fulfilled in love of God, self & neighbor, to encourage wisdom and increase strength, to benefit ourselves and our families, and to assure our hope & future (Prov. 23:12-19, 24:13-14). (cf., also, Proverbs 10:13, 13:24, 22:8 & 15, and 29:15)

Jesus' words give the context of love to every law and consequence: "But love your enemies, do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return. Your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High; for he is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked. Be merciful, just as your father is merciful." (Luke 6:35-36) Only in the power of the Holy Spirit, which operates through love & self-giving service, do we have a prayer for fulfill his call to us.

A provocative solution to the current prison overcrowding in the US was offered by a professor of criminal justice, Peter Moskos. Salon interviewed him, here. Moskos’ book, In Defense of Flogging, offers the “outrageous idea” of returning the option (by giving the convicted person the freedom to choose) of flogging to the sentencing roster. The interviewer expressed rightful concern that flogging harkens back to days of slavery and other oppressive & abusive relationships. Moskos made the points that prison is a worse punishment and actually may be more detrimental to most prisoners & their families than flogging. A friend who works among the urban poor in a violent neighborhood considered this proposal a possible alternative to passive-aggressive incarceration and ostracism from society that most people commend, today. The fact is that most people in power who make the sentencing decisions really don’t care sufficiently for the people to want to rehabilitate them, so whatever “rod” of punishment is meted out – whether imprisonment, abandonment, social isolation, or flogging – it will more likely perpetuate current patterns of alienation, economic, social & racial injustice, in isolation from healthy contexts. Should we ask, however, if a foolish criminal has or would welcome relationships with wise individuals and a community who can mentor and guide him/her into better paths, might a flogging soon over be a better option than years isolated and tortured with other criminals in a destructive environment? Are we, the church, not called to be such a community offering redemption & hope to one another? (Matthew 25:31-46)

What does it mean to "pass judgment"? (Take Two)

Is it passing judgment to discern that, according to a certain understanding (aka, "religion") of reality, truth, wisdom, and trajectories of consequences (years, decades & generations), certain choices, behaviors, actions & words don't build up individuals, families, communities & posterity? Discernment is always a function of responding to explicit and implicit law-based parameters. Broadly speaking, Law is always set in physical embodied reality, and defines what actions are right/wrong, healthy/unhealthy, wise/unwise, and constructive/destructive for people to take. (cf. Romans 2:12-16)


OR: is "judgment" taking an action based on that discernment -- for instance, legislating against behaviors and mandating subsequent actions in consequences (fines, banishment, imprisonment, excommunication, etc.). Judgment can also be a supportive action, commending and approving of others' actions in the community or in the written laws governing that community. (Biblical examples of supportive judgments would be the commendation of the care of widows and orphans, or the just treatment of aliens.) However, sinful judgments also exist in human societies; "gossip" is considered a sinful judgment on others, according to Scripture. Thus, one person exercising wise or unwise discernment can sin against others with that discernment. Likewise, discernment can be followed by a choice to love (act patiently, kindly & with delight in truth, without envy, pride, quick temper, boastfulness, self-seeking, recording wrongs, etc.).



If a person doesn't commend or approve a behavioral course of action based on his/her discernment & parameters, does that mean s/he is "passing judgment", even should s/he follows love's paths with those behaving thus? (Biblically-defined Love is not hormonally, affinity or preferentially based.) Fundamentally, to require that person to approve of something that s/he hadn't approved of, heretofore, is to ask her/him to change the parameters (or laws) by which they discern reality, truth, wisdom and consequences.



It seems prudent to be clear: it is asking people to change their religion when, for the sake of maintaining relationships, they are required to commend, approve of, or disapprove of and disavow behaviors and actions which their lives &/or the canon by which they've been living have not commended, approved of, or disapproved of & disavowed those behaviors/actions. According to my understanding, that requirement defines proselytizing, not loving others. My religion calls me to love and serve others, not to proselytize them.


The tension of loving ourselves & others while not approving of everything we or they do is difficult to sustain. (I'd say that it's impossible to sustain without the empowering of the Holy Spirit!) Our natural human cop-out is to make new law, or appeal to old law, and use that law to pass judgment on others; thereby we relieve ourselves of the tension and can choose which persons we will choose to "love" and which persons are unworthy of "love". We then use our law to choose whom to include in our circle, and whom to exclude.


But, God's love is perfect (Matt. 5:43-48), and Jesus us calls us to "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." The telos - the goal - of God's law is love.

Perception & Reception

An essential lesson that most parents learn - and one they hope their children learn, too - is that while we may correct or restrain our children from doing something dangerous, unethical, selfish, or harmful, those very corrections and restraints aren't received by our children as "love." Their reactions inform parents of their displeasure: temper tantrums, sulking, throwing toys, stomping, door slamming, sibling fights, and the like. As adults, we know the consequences that our children do not. We perceive correction, restraint and discipline as intrinsic to loving our children. We don't want them to harm themselves, others, or suffer the consequences of their bad actions. We want them to consider their actions well before they act. (As they age, the actions assume greater significance, involve more serious consequences, and attain life-changing proportions.) Parentally-imposed consequences of correction, restraint, and disciplinary action when children continue to act destructively, harmfully, selfishly, or carelessly, therefore, are essential to appropriate parental love. The Biblical definition of Love incorporates all of this. God's Love includes truth, justice, consequences, mercy, and the promotion of just actions. (The biblical definition of Love is distinguished here from the folk-religious understanding of love by the use of capital "L".)

The folk-religious, popular and facile definition of love relates love to feelings (e.g., "happiness"), emotions, and self-centered perception. Even the delivery of factual information regarding the inevitable results of one's choices, words and actions, is considered to be "unloving" and "judgmental." Consequentially, any correction, discipline and restraint are out of bounds between adults (even within voluntary organizations such as churches, or in corporations). Correction, restraint and discipline are also increasingly considered inappropriate, even unlawful, between parents and children in many areas.

It is certain that humans would prefer never to be informed that our actions are harmful to ourselves or others, never to be corrected, and never, ever to receive consequences for any act we commit, omit, or any errors we make. Thus, we misuse our reasoning abilities in order to externalize all the results we experience; i.e., we blame other people, circumstances, generalities, and Godself for the natural results of our choices, actions and words.

Pearl Mary-Teresa Richards Craigie (writing as John O. Hobbes): "Men heap together the 'mistakes' of their lives and create a monster they call, 'Destiny'." [NB: the quotation marks around 'mistakes' are mine, and reflect my understanding that many actions we retrospectively call, "mistakes", were intentionally committed at the time.]

The transformation we hope to see in our children, while continuing to parent appropriately and carefully, is the transformation in reception. Children growing into teenagers, and then into adults without this transformation will always tend to misperceive Parental Love. This Love includes boundary-setting, information, reality-checks, and then correction, discipline, consequences and encouragement to exhibit behavioral changes. Children receive that Love in a lump as Judgment. In actuality, judgment is not found in Loving (or even unloving!) discernment of error and warning of consequences. Judgment is realized consequences, whether good or bad. The Hindus name this result, Karma. "What goes around comes around." "You reap what you sow." Christians should not depose God as Judge by becoming judges ourselves, imposing consequences for one's situation, unless we're exercising godly authority in an appropriate position and setting, and being Spirit-led. (cf. James 2:1-7) In fact, without God, we may naturally misread another person's situation itself to be a verdict and judgment, when it's not that at all. (cf. John 9:1-5, or the Hindu caste system, or classism, or racism)

The transformation parents long for is in the reception: "can't you see that I discipline, correct, and restrain you because I love you?" We want our children to be re-wired to receive us as "loving" not as unloving Judges. In the parental role, we should impose just consequences on childish and selfish behaviors. Yet, we need to be judges within the context of Love, and we need to contextualize, interpret, and apply the reality of consequences to their level of understanding. We realize that our children need to grasp that there are good/bad bodily, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual consequences to every action, reaction, word, harbored thought, behavior, and habit. A friend who worked in an inner city high school for troubled youth once told me that all he did, day in and day out, was try to teach teenagers that there are consequences for every action. The older we get, the more baggage we accumulate, the stronger we resist correction, the harder it is to experience the transformation in reception.

There comes a time in each of our lives, though, when the "safer" and limited consequences that healthy parents impose are laid aside because they're overtaken by the harsher consequences that outsiders will carry out or that we receive in ourselves and our families. These consequences occur because we refuse correction in the name of a "happiness" which is marked by a presence of pleasure, with an avoidance of discomfort, responsibilities and self-discipline. Schools and teachers may impose disciplinary procedures upon children. Children may bully, ostracize, and physically hurt others because they don't know appropriate boundaries. Police, courts and prisons may get involved as children become disorderly, uncorrectable young adults. More unwise and untransformed adults form families. Dysfunctional marriages and maltreatment of spouses and children may result, creating a whole new generation of unreceptive, untransformed, unloving people. These people are not only unable to receive or offer Love, they simply cannot even perceive Love. Because of this inability to face themselves internally and assess the real consequences of their own choices, they externalize the blame - they "create a monster they call, 'Destiny'."

They've missed the message of God's holy and holistic Love: "Every time you make a choice you are turning the central part of you, the part of you that chooses, into something a little different than it was before. And taking your life as a whole with all your innumerable choices, all your life long you are slowly turning this central thing either into a heavenly creature or a hellish creature." -- C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

We grasp the despair of God lamenting over his children when we lament over untransformed, unreceptive and unwelcoming people around us: "Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to it. How often have I desired to gather your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing! See, your house is left to you desolate. For I tell you, you will not see me again until you say, 'Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the LORD.'" (Matt. 23:37-39)

Let us welcome Love, today!

[Re]Writing the Story

It’s there in the texts of Matthew 28:11-15, Mark 16:8-14, Luke 24:9-11, 36-42, and John 20:24-28. Others’ fears and desires to retain power, remain comfortable, resist any change, keep their employment (or heads!) and maintain the status quo cause them to deny the disciples’ stories of the resurrection and to spread lies by creating a false story. Another risk is also written in the texts, too, that the disciples would believe the false story because of their own fears, incredulity, limitations, or lack of ability to see the risen Lord.

False stories serve some purpose. The false stories we tell about ourselves and others justify our actions, rationalize our choices, and deny the affects of what we do or say on ourselves and those around us. False stories usually have some unifying principle that sounds glorious and righteous: e.g., protecting the people (cf. Matt. 28:14), maintaining order, spreading democracy or “free” markets, keeping costs low, ensuring control, “loving” someone, personal freedom, privacy, rights, individual responsibility, forgiveness, peace, group culture, etc. The bass motif underlying all these stories is, however, the justification of a denial or overriding of the truth in another’s life or story. The purportedly “higher” end and principle are betrayed by the process of falsifying another person. Abusers triumph over their victims when they succeed in convincing the victim that the false story is really “truth.”

Massimo & I committed ourselves as parents to do our best to reflect truth to our kids. We told the truth that we believe – we’re each created by a loving God whose love for us is revealed in the self-giving and self-emptying of Christ Jesus. At other times, reflecting truth meant not allowing them to lie or to rationalize their own poor behavior in reaction to another’s wrong; sometimes, it meant confessing our own failures to be loving when we were stressed and our reaction to them revealed more about our immaturity than about their errors or childishness. Reciting the true story to them helps them be grounded in truth and their own identity and worth before God. Reflecting truth also means having the courage to stand against others’ lies and false stories which harm the liar and damage the community.

Paul used “standing” in Christ to describe our posture before liars and accusers. “Stand therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the equipment of the gospel of peace; besides all these, taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one.” (Eph. 6:14-16) There have been and will be times in each of our lives where someone lies about us to preserve their own false story. As Christians, we need to examine ourselves; we know that truth doesn’t threaten us but heals us. Then, when we face accusations, we don’t have to cower in fear or to attack and create a diversion. If the story is true, we need God to help us change in order that we may conform to Christ in truth. If the story is false, we trust God to deliver us while we continue to stand. Faith in God is expressed in truth and standing, not in running or fighting fire with fire.

Arthur Frank reflected on the thoughts of Vaclav Havel in The Renewal of Generosity. Reformation from oppressive systems has to begin individually, because the nature of oppression that is institutional and structural requires individuals to subsume themselves. To overcome the pattern, the individuals have to reform themselves. “Under [institutional oppression], people were unable to see their moral selves revealed in their actions; instead they could see themselves only as actors in a story imposed on them from elsewhere. …No one should have any illusions about the capacity of institutional reform to bring about a renewal of generosity. It’s the reverse: personal acts of generosity have the potential to affect the values that determine what goals are sought by reform.” (pp. 28-29)

Telling the truth is dangerous business. The corrupted authorities want truth-tellers silenced, institutions want to hoard their positions and resources rather than be generous, and power-brokers want Christ crucified. Sometimes we’ll see the corruption ahead, and sometimes we’ll be blind-sided. However, James told believers that we must never stop looking into the perfect law that sets us free – using Frank’s analogy, I believe that we will always be able to see our moral selves and act accordingly when we’re standing in Christ. Only “in Christ” are we known and do we know the true light who reveals us to ourselves and before God’s face. As we humbly meditate on God’s Word and pray daily, we trust the Holy Spirit to weave humility and truth into the fabric of our being. Whether we live or die, metaphorically, in this particular battle, we know Whom we serve: “It is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be put to shame in any way, but that by my speaking with all boldness, Christ will be exalted now as always in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me, living is Christ and dying is gain.” (Phil. 1:20-21)

Christ is risen!
He is risen, indeed!
May Christ arise in every one of us, this day, and in the days ahead.